Black Friday Confuses Racist Uncle

November 18, 2018

Scranton, pa

A family in Pennsylvania was finishing their Thanksgiving dinner, when talk turned to Black Friday plans. At which point Uncle Owen, well known ‘day drinker’ and “monument aficionado” chimed in.

“There’s Black Lives Matter, Black History Month, even a Black President, why do we need Black Friday?”

Family members patiently explained the day’s origin as the beginning of the retail season in which businesses hoped turn a profit and end the year “in the black”.

Uncle Owen however, continued to defend his position between gulps of brandy.

“We gave them their own drinking fountains, their own lunch counters, even their own schools. I’m done trying.”

Sensing the mood of the room had changed, Uncle Owen summarized his position in the following:

“It’s not like I’m a racist or anything. We have a black guy at work.”

When asked if he would do his Christmas shopping online, Owen replied uncomfortable with Deliverymen. “I’ll just go to Walmart where it’s safe.”